Online, but not like that.
Jun. 3rd, 2022 07:30 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
rogueslayer452I sometimes wonder if I'm strange for not really getting into social media.
Aside from DW (and formerly LJ) and Tumblr, I don't use anything else. Sure, I'll browse other places for content and whatnot, but I don't have accounts anywhere else. Mostly because it's easier to maintain without having to constantly keep track of a dozen other places, but also I just never had any desire to sign up for anywhere else unless it appeals to me, which the majority of social media doesn't. I always felt like this was kind of the norm, that while people can be online not everyone uses social media, but it seems like people are expecting you to have a Twitter account or an Instagram or something along those lines, and when you say you don't they'll be confused. I'm online but for fun, not for networking, and I prefer the anonymity of that and no, I'm not comfortable sharing with some random strangers in real life what I use because it's none of their business and yet somehow they seem to think is.
Similarly, I prefer to have control of the things I consume in regards to media. I don't use Goodreads. I don't use Letterboxd. I still use an MP3 player instead of Spotify. I prefer buying physical copies of books/CDs/DVDs. I am not a Luddite, obviously, I just don't want to be beholden to an unreliable algorithm or things that will inevitably be taken away at any given moment.
This is kind of all over the place, but yeah.
Aside from DW (and formerly LJ) and Tumblr, I don't use anything else. Sure, I'll browse other places for content and whatnot, but I don't have accounts anywhere else. Mostly because it's easier to maintain without having to constantly keep track of a dozen other places, but also I just never had any desire to sign up for anywhere else unless it appeals to me, which the majority of social media doesn't. I always felt like this was kind of the norm, that while people can be online not everyone uses social media, but it seems like people are expecting you to have a Twitter account or an Instagram or something along those lines, and when you say you don't they'll be confused. I'm online but for fun, not for networking, and I prefer the anonymity of that and no, I'm not comfortable sharing with some random strangers in real life what I use because it's none of their business and yet somehow they seem to think is.
Similarly, I prefer to have control of the things I consume in regards to media. I don't use Goodreads. I don't use Letterboxd. I still use an MP3 player instead of Spotify. I prefer buying physical copies of books/CDs/DVDs. I am not a Luddite, obviously, I just don't want to be beholden to an unreliable algorithm or things that will inevitably be taken away at any given moment.
This is kind of all over the place, but yeah.
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Date: 2022-06-04 03:53 am (UTC)I don't think you're weird for not getting into more social media than DW/LJ and tumblr. That stuff is built to get you addicted. If you're sticking to as few as you feasibly can/only the few you want to, honestly that's a good thing, and a lot of people would be better of without twitter. It's unfortunately just been the refuge for a lot of artists who want to share their work, either for fun or work, as alternatives shut down, so a lot of folks use it, and it's been a big help to people reporting on news for countries with restrictive communication laws. Same with instagram, deviantart, artstation, etc. So if that's not something you have to worry about/you're not interested in, I think you're fine.
Discord started, so far as I'm aware, as a resource for video gamers. An alternative to Ventrilo. During the pandemic it's just been the easiest way for a lot of folks to talk overseas, particularly in groups. But I mean if you have a community elsewhere, or aren't looking for one, I don't think it's bad you don't use that either, if you don't? I only use facebook to see what my family is up to because I basically never talk to them. Same with like... peers I haven't spoken to in years.
For me I like following a lot of artists (and buying art), and twitter, insta, and tumblr are the primary ways I find them (and a couple on facebook groups). So I stick around there. But it's not weird if you don't.
For media, I just like trackers because it shows me how much I've done over the year, which makes me feel less like a slob lol I have bad memory, so it's also a good way to keep track of how I felt about something at the time I read it, rather than when my memory of it changed later on. But Goodreads is owned by Amazon, and that's enough of a reason for people to avoid it. It's also easily abused, which is another of the many reasons to avoid it. Alternatively, I use those kinds of sites like myanimelist to look for recommendations, and basically never bother with the social aspect outside reading reviews sometimes. I don't use Letterboxd, either. A friend does, but I never got into it.
I also tend to not use streaming music, film, or TV. I'm too used to media I like being taken away from me (or idk what if my Internet dies or I'm out of range of wi-fi). While streaming is convenient sometimes, I try to get a copy I control - typically physical - whenever possible, and keep back-ups as I can. I do find e-copies of things easy to use in terms of accessibility. I used to carry about big doorstopper books, and they'd destroy my hand. And I had to pick and choose what I wanted to take with me on trips, often running out of stuff to read. Now I don't. I have my whole library at my fingertips and it's not heavy to carry.
tldr; it's not bad you don't XD There's a lot of different reasons people do use different ones and even more than a couple at once. If they're being weird about you not doing it, that's on them, not you XD
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Date: 2022-06-09 09:57 pm (UTC)and a lot of people would be better of without twitter.
Tell me about it. That place really created such a toxic environment, and I don't think it was like that initially, it just became that way overtime, which is unfortunate. And while I'm sure there are some good elements to the place, sadly the bad far outweigh the good at this point. It's just a cesspool and reactionary culture and doomscrolling.
I think that's been my observation with social media in general, setting aside the myriad of other issues, is that it becomes so overwhelming with everything that goes on there. It's been said that people aren't meant to take in all of this kind of information at once, and social media, depending on the platform and how you can filter things, it can be impossible to avoid the things you don't want to see so in a way you know that you should log-off it's like a trainwreck, you can't help but be enticed to doomscroll out of sheer morbid curiosity. And then it becomes stressful and overwhelming and your brain gets frazzled, and it's probably why so many people don't think before they react to things. I mean, it's great that we have the technology to know what's going on with things in the world, to be more educated and knowledgeable, but the way we tend to consume and even interact with such information isn't always the best for our, and other people's, well-being.
It's just like, it's good to have different options to choose which platform best suits your specific needs, but moderation and knowing your limits is key. And I know, for me at least, I don't think I can handle going on social media.
(Also note, I hate have social media has begun not allowing non-users to even browse without signing up. I also hate how some news sites even put articles behind a paywall, like fuck that shit.)
I also tend to not use streaming music, film, or TV. I'm too used to media I like being taken away from me (or idk what if my Internet dies or I'm out of range of wi-fi). While streaming is convenient sometimes, I try to get a copy I control - typically physical - whenever possible
Same, that's my thought process as well. The convenience is nice, but we cannot, and shouldn't, be solely relying on streaming or anything online because the Internet might not always be here, whether due to power outages or not having a strong connection or being in a place where it's restricted. That's kind of why I go, "if the Internet were to go out now, would I still have these things?" Because if not, then that's a problem. I think people truly think the Internet will always be here when that's not true. Anyone who has gone through even the smallest of power outages will know that feeling of frustration. So yeah. I want to physically own the things I have, I want that level of control instead of having companies and corporations control that for me.
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Date: 2022-06-04 04:15 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2022-06-05 09:11 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2022-06-04 06:08 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2022-06-04 11:33 am (UTC)*I mean, celebrities posting stupid stuff and rightfully getting called out, that's one thing. I saw someone get dogpiled for what was an obvious joke that got lost because tone on the internet. They even confirmed it was a joke, but it was in another tweet that of course wasn't the one being spread. That's what I'm afraid of.
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Date: 2022-06-05 09:10 am (UTC)But yeah, curating your online experience is definitely a way to make you happier, and saner.
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Date: 2022-06-05 11:39 am (UTC)I hope more people join DW after their concern at the fact that Musk bought Twitter.
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Date: 2022-06-05 08:44 pm (UTC)While I do want some of the fandom folks who migrated from LJ/DW to Twitter years ago to return, it's doubtful most will.
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Date: 2022-06-04 06:53 am (UTC)I'm pretty much the same way. I've had LJ (and now DW) since 2003, but other than that, I don't really use social media at all. The only other platform I check regularly is Instagram, but I've never posted a single thing there myself, and I'm only following accounts that post photos of Andy Lau. That's the only thing I see there. I used to have a Tumblr account, several years ago, purely for following people who posted photos of David Bowie. I never posted anything there, either.
I'm also the same as you with music and movies -- I buy physical copies of everything I care about. I don't enjoy reading e-books, so I only do it if there's no physical copy available. I still play CDs when I'm driving, and on my phone/computer I play music I've ripped from my CDs, or downloaded. A lot of the stuff I want to listen to isn't even on apps like Spotify, and besides, I don't want to pay a monthly fee for music, or listen to their ads! And exactly as you say, on streaming services, your favorite songs/movies/media might not always be available, and could disappear anytime. Or they might be available but censored/altered/abridged in some way. :|
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Date: 2022-06-07 10:51 am (UTC)A lot of the stuff I want to listen to isn't even on apps like Spotify, and besides, I don't want to pay a monthly fee for music, or listen to their ads!
Exactly! I listen to a wide range of music and I guarantee that it most likely isn't even available on Spotify. I hear so many people complain about services not having an album or even taking artists away (same with things like Netflix, having something and then taking it away). I'm sorry, I'm not going to rely on streaming services to enjoy the media I want to if that's how they're going to operate by holding certain things hostage just so they can get more money.
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Date: 2022-06-04 11:23 am (UTC)I wish I'd kept my CD player or DVD player, honestly. I might buy one. I bought all my music on iTunes eons ago (when it first became a thing), then eons after that iTunes decided to eat all my music. I got a new phone and bought
a few songs on Google Music. Then Google Music went away. Now I just listen to music on YouTube, but there are ads, or sometimes you end up getting the live version of songs, which I generally hate. I was finally going to cave and get spotify, then Joe Rogan happened.
I'm with you on physical books. I prefer those.
Also, I still use a laptop for internet things. I have no idea how some people mostly or even only use their phones. That being said, as I begin to bid adieu to ANOTHER laptop, I also kind of understand it? Plus, phones are easier to travel with. I just find typing on my phone difficult for writing. But a lot of people aren't into the interent to write, so... there you have it. Or they figured out how to type on their phones quickly. I think a lot of people actually only know how to use the internet on their phones, because they never used it much - if at all - before using your phone for internet stuff was a thing.
Also, a lot of people default to using what we called "netspeak" or "chatspeak" back in the day. I regret how snobby I used to be about it, but I still have trouble taking it seriously. I'm sorry. I just do. My brain will not compute "u" for "you" or "ur" for "your," no matter how profound your point is. I don't judge anyone, I just don't follow.
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Date: 2022-06-05 09:54 pm (UTC)Oh, definitely get them when you can. For a DVD player, I'd say get a Bluray player since it plays both Bluray and regular DVDs.
Unless necessary, we never really throw anything out, because even if it's considered "obsolete" if it can play things that I have, why not still use it? I mean, we still have old VCRs because I have tons of VHS tapes (I recorded like crazy back in the day before we ended up getting a DVD player) so hopefully we can do the transfer from VHS to digital to preserve them.
Also, I still use a laptop for internet things. I have no idea how some people mostly or even only use their phones.
I barely use any apps on my phone, to be honest. I will use the Internet to look things up (and my Kindle as well) but otherwise I use my laptop for pretty much everything.
I cannot for the life of me know how to type quickly on a phone. I type relatively fast on any other keyboard, but a digital touch pad? It's impossible for me. And I've tried, and while I'm not exactly bad it's always frustrating when I press on the right letter and it gives me the letter right next to it instead. I can manage, but I personally prefer the tangibility of keys on a keyboard.
My brain will not compute "u" for "you" or "ur" for "your,"
Eh, I do, mostly because I've gotten used to it. Of course I pronounce the words in my head as what they mean versus how they sound (ex: for me it's "oh my god" for "omg" instead of "oh em gee" as some would phonetically say it aloud).
(Although now it's become more complicated because, with certain social media platforms now suspending/deleting people for using specific words, you'll get people purposefully using netspeak to avoid getting flagged, which is doubly annoying for obvious reasons.)
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Date: 2022-06-06 12:59 pm (UTC)Of course I pronounce the words in my head as what they mean versus how they sound (ex: for me it's "oh my god" for "omg" instead of "oh em gee" as some would phonetically say it aloud).
Ahh, see, no, for me it's just "OMG." And that may actually make a difference. I also have a learning disability that's kind of all over the place in terms of tangible diagnosis (keeping in mind it was in the 90's, I'm sure now there's a precise label), and there are definitely dyslexic traits in there. So that actually could be part of the problem - my brain takes a few extra seconds to compute "u" being "you", by which point I've already kept scrolling. I don't know that that's it, it might just be subconscious leftover snobbery, which isn't great but hopefully I eventually get past it. I will say, however, that entering in codes with strings of letters and/or numbers also kills me inside. After the first three letters or numbers, it's babble. But maybe everyone has that problem and it's just a side effect of living in a technology based world. Codes that 020421185-103032-WTF. Or entering in my credit card number if it doesn't allow me to space it out.
I know YouTube has been censoring. Drives me nuts. I appreciate trigger warnings, but you know that's not even remotely what YT is concerned about.
I'm not sure if my dad kept any VHS tapes, but I honestly doubt it. Which is maybe a shame. It would be cool to watch movies from the 90s (and earlier!) on a converted platform instead of trying to find them online, which isn't always possible. I wanted to rewatch Home Alone last Christmas, and it wasn't on Netflix, and I wasn't going to buy it all over again when I saw the movie 600 times back in the early 90's. (Which is also the problem with paid platforms, you're still not necessarily paying for what you actually want. I don't even pay for Netflix, actually, I'm a user on my dad's account. Shh.) Last time I saw our VCR collection, Home Alone was definitely included. But I bet he threw all of them out.
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Date: 2022-06-09 07:54 pm (UTC)This could probably be it as well, yeah. I mean, I also took computer class in school, but I learned how to type fast without looking at home on my own time, so that's also another factor. I knew people who learned how to type fast on their phones with only their thumbs. It's all a learned skill, regardless, and depending on how much practice you have you can get the hang of it. I actually was getting the hang of typing on my older phones (not as fast as on a regular keyboard, but close enough) before forcibly switching to ones with a touchpad which is by far harder.
I also have a learning disability that's kind of all over the place in terms of tangible diagnosis (keeping in mind it was in the 90's, I'm sure now there's a precise label), and there are definitely dyslexic traits in there.
Ah, that makes sense, and definitely makes a difference.
I know YouTube has been censoring. Drives me nuts. I appreciate trigger warnings, but you know that's not even remotely what YT is concerned about.
The fact that I watch videos where they have to either silence a word, actually bleep it out like it's network television or use substitute words/acronyms to get their point across so their video doesn't get taken down is absolutely stupid, imho. But, y'know, censorship is stupid as a whole.
It would be cool to watch movies from the 90s (and earlier!) on a converted platform instead of trying to find them online, which isn't always possible.
Yeah, also I like looking back on what the television era was like back int he day. One of my favorite things is going on YouTube and looking up the commercials someone has graciously uploaded from converting their old VHS takes onto digital from different television stations and seeing how times have changed, or seeing what was advertised, etc. It's preserving a kind of history in our culture. Also, especially when it comes to shows or even movies that were televised, you get to see the songs they used that they probably couldn't use for any kind of official DVD/digital release. I've gotten DVD sets for shows and none of the songs that I remember during the original airing made it and they replaced it with something else (or have it completely silent which is just awkward, ruining the flow of the scene).
Which is also the problem with paid platforms, you're still not necessarily paying for what you actually want.
Yeah, and that's super frustrating. :/
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Date: 2022-06-04 11:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2022-06-09 07:55 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2022-06-04 12:07 pm (UTC)Buying physical media on the other hand is something I also do! I use Spotify, but if I like an album, I buy it on CD. I also still buy DVD/Blu-rays.
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Date: 2022-06-04 12:32 pm (UTC)LJ and then DW were/are the place I'm comfortable online, and I've mainly only lurked in other spaces. I'm not on twitter or facebook or instagram; I'm barely on discord; don't have whatsapp or anything of the like; I never even was on tumblr. Totally agreed it's frustrating how people just expect you to be on these sites. I don't want to!
Sounds like we're the samea in a lot of ways! I keep all my bookmarks offline. I save fics I want to reread. I want physical copies or DRM-free files of media I love, and I only occasionally stream things to check them out. I want my things to be my things, not something I depend on some other entity to have access to.
So, basically, high fives. *g*
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Date: 2022-06-07 11:09 am (UTC)And just in general, I prefer the anonymity and ability to disappear without worrying that I'm performing for any kind of audience, which is what the social media climate feels like. That's not for me.
And yes to saving fics! :D I remember the days when I would print out fanfic from ff.net and put them in binders, but now I save them without wasting so much paper, lol!
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Date: 2022-06-04 06:31 pm (UTC)I do have a Facebook (it was under another name for years, a name from a book), and that is where I connect with my family and real-life friends. Just last year, found some cousins in Portugal! So we get to talk and I get to see pictures of Lisbon and Madeira and all, which is awesome, and which I'd never get to see otherwise.
And I do have a Twitter, 'cause I need to get news somewhere. So i follow NPR and Reuters and AP News and things like that, plus a bunch of space sites (NASA but also Hubble Space Telescope and such), and a bunch of 'pretty pictures from nature' accounts, because we all need gorgeous beach sunsets and amazing, snowy sunrise pictures from time to time. :D
I *do* comment on stuff on Twitter - it's where I'm uber-political - but I also highly curate my feed and block anybody that gets stupid or abusive or whatever.
But I can totally see why a lot of people would just...rather not. I limit myself to short (15 min) sessions on both platforms, because holy fuck.
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Date: 2022-06-04 06:32 pm (UTC)I still use an ipod to listen to music too and I like having tangible books.
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Date: 2022-06-07 09:02 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2022-06-04 09:17 pm (UTC)I used to use social media more "traditionally" when I was at university - it was useful for connecting with academics and potential jobs, and for keeping track of events I might want to attend. But now I just use Facebook messenger so I can co-ordinate with work friends/family.
Twitter, Tumblr, DW & discord are for finding art & fic & meta + for fandom friends - I have no desire for more "public" attention than that.
[Edited to add] I buy music I care about either on CD or via Bandcamp, since you can download it, and I mostly just use Spotify for podcasts. And to save other people's playlists, since that's a fun way to discover new music, haha.
But there's nothing wrong with how you choose to use - or not use - social media! It's a tool just like anything else, and if it isn't useful to you, then there's no reason for you to have it.
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Date: 2022-06-04 10:17 pm (UTC)The only other things I have outside of DW is a 'professional' Twitter account I catch up with maybe once a week and a FB account under an anonymous name that has no information in it that's just used so I can speak to my parents through the Facebook Portal my younger brother bought for them.
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Date: 2022-06-05 10:21 am (UTC)I have an Instagram I use when I'm traveling, Twitter for pretty pictures interspersed with some clever folks, a discord for when online cons happen, and a tumblr I haven't touched in ages.
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Date: 2022-06-05 07:39 pm (UTC)I'm happy to remain in my private little curated bubble that isn't social media. I do check some of those places from time to time, because again, some fan content is there, but otherwise I go back to DW/Tumblr because those are the places where I much prefer for my fandom engagement.
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Date: 2022-06-06 10:38 am (UTC)I pretty much only use tumblr, DW, and AO3. I do have a twitter account that is purely fannish and that I log in to every... two months or so. I do not understand that site and I also don't want to. I hate the algorithm and that nothing is chornological, that it just puts lots of stuff on my timeline that "I might like", which is super annoying.
It's all frustrating and exhausting. Now that I've started bookbinding, I've been told several times to come to Discord for chatting about it and asking for help if need be etc. And I'm like, Yeah thanks but I don't have the headspace and energy to get into yet another social media site, one that it markedly different from everything i'm use to, too. Also, I've heard that this is actually not the best for actual discussions, because of timezones and I'm just... tired.
Also, with twitter, it doesn't even always work correctly. Like, I wanted to DM someone (they have DMs open and I follow them), so it seems like I can contact them. But the message won't send. It doesn't tell me why. No idea. It's so irritating and sending that message in the first place took a bit of courgae on my part because it's messaging someone I have not interacted with in any way besides putting a few likes on their pics.
Like, what's the point of all these shitty functions if they don't work? *sigh*
I also defintely prefer buying everything instead of using subscription services! I do screen record original stuff from Netflix because they don't provide DVDs for it and then just... take it down suddenly. I buy everything else I like if I'm able. I also still use an mp3 player because I don't want to pay for a music subscription service that takes up space on my phone for lots of music i'm not interested in.
All this stuff where you have to pay, pay pay but don't actually own anything - I'm not doing it. Fuck them.
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Date: 2022-06-07 08:49 am (UTC)I think when it comes to social media, or just any place online in general really, is that every single one has a specific purpose and people will gravitate towards the ones that will fulfills their particular needs that they want with an online experience. Which in a way is great to have options, but at the same time completely overwhelming when there's just so much.
All this stuff where you have to pay, pay pay but don't actually own anything - I'm not doing it. Fuck them.
Yeah, same. It's really infuriating.
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Date: 2022-06-12 07:31 pm (UTC)It is indeed all so overwhelming. :( It looks like we'll have to start with Instagram at work, for our company, because it seems that many of our new potential customers hang around there a lot and we need to open up new marketing channels. My boss is very old by now and doesn't have the headspace for it (I don't have the headspace for it XD) but I guess a colleague and I will do some kind of training for Instagram to understand that shit. *sigh*
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Date: 2022-06-07 09:38 am (UTC)Basically, I get you!
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Date: 2022-06-07 08:03 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2022-06-09 02:35 pm (UTC)I don't like depending on Netflix etc. for all of my media because, as you say, it can disappear without warning. I like buying things to keep just in case when I like them.
So much of social media feels really toxic these days. I'm hoping society starts to move away from it more.
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Date: 2022-06-11 11:48 am (UTC)Exactly. The convenience is all well and good, but we shouldn't be relying entirely on streaming services for our media when we don't actually properly own it ourselves. Why pay for a service to watch a movie/show that I own, or should own? Streaming and physical media should be able to coexist, but sadly the streaming wars have really made it impossible for us to really have that.
So much of social media feels really toxic these days. I'm hoping society starts to move away from it more.
Agreed.
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Date: 2022-06-14 12:18 pm (UTC)It's like no one is realizing that we're near, and possibly beyond, peak capitalism. Most of the money has already funneled to the top and most of us don't have more to keep spending thoughtlessly.
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Date: 2022-06-10 10:59 pm (UTC)I think the correct approach to social media is to treat it like a tool- as long as it helps you, cool. If it isn't, then toss it out.
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Date: 2022-06-11 11:40 am (UTC)Yeah, agreed. Everyone is different and every site, not just social media but anywhere online, serves a particular purpose and if you find that a certain place works for you, then that's great. But once it becomes too overwhelming, which some places can become, or that you're no longer enjoying it you shouldn't feel obligated to remain there. Sadly, there is that addictive factor when it comes to social media, which is why people will remain on certain apps even if it makes them miserable. I've seen people say they've deleted and then reinstalled certain apps multiple times and....that's not good, tbh.
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Date: 2022-06-12 12:24 am (UTC)